At Douchebags.com, we flush the bacteria, parasites and accumulated scum out into the bright, refreshing light of public scrutiny. The term "douchebag" needs no formal explanation - you know one when you see one. The term is experiencing somewhat of a revival these days and we are pleased to do our part in pushing this delightful word back into the American lexicon.
Gwen Stefani is a great singer and she seems to be a fabulous parent. Same goes for Gavin Rossdale, her husband and the lead singer of the now-defunct band Bush. Which is why it pains me so to make them douchebags of the day. But for the love of God why why why would they name their newborn son Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale??!
Millionaire husband and wife super-douchebag team, Mahender Sabhnani and Varsha Sabhnani from Long Island, NY finally got their day in court and were rightfully slammed with lengthy prison sentences for enslaving and abusing their two Indonesian housekeepers for years.
Varsha, the wife and primary abuser of household help, was sentenced to 11 years in the clink for such offenses as beating the two domestic workers with umbrellas and brooms, slashing them with knives and making them take freezing showers as punishment. Her husband Mahender who didn’t inflict physical injury on the workers but permitted the abuse to go on was sentenced to 3 years and 4 months in federal prison.
Before he was sentenced, Sabhnani pleaded for mercy on behalf of his four adult children and asked, through his attorney, to be sentenced to home confinement instead of prison.
He said his children say “if you go, who’s going to help us? How can we do it on our own?” His three daughters, who live at home, are in their 20s and his teenaged son is about to go to college in Washington, D.C.
Ummm…Perhaps he and his wife should have thought about that before they decided to enslave and torture their housekeepers.
Ocean Township, New Jersey police officer Sonia Henriquez is two months pregnant. And like pretty much every other pregnant mother out there, she wants to do everything to make sure her pregnancy goes without a hitch – like eating right, taking prenatal vitamins, NOT GETTING SHOT. But town officials aren’t as caring. Seems Officer Henriques (who, by the way, was awarded a medal of valor in December for persuading a person who was holding a loaded gun at her to surrender) requested light duty due to her pregnancy and was denied by township officials. Police Chief Antonio Amodio Jr. told the Asbury Park Press that he was following township policy when he told Officer Henriques that she had to stay on patrol or take an unpaid leave of absence. Hopefully Officer Henriquez has a good lawyer who will spank these douchebags silly.
Accused of treating her bailiff like a “houseboy,” Judge Elizabeth Halverson is today’s Douchebag of the Day! In addition to such douchey behavior as forcing her bailiff to massage her back, put her shoes on her feet, and cover her with a blanket for a nap, Judge Halverson also hired her own bodyguards because she allegedly didn’t trust the court’s guards. This douche has since been brought up on judicial-misconduct charges that include not only misusing her position and treating her staff like personal valets, but also tainting juries and falling asleep on the bench. Brilliant.
There are many levels of douchebagotry. Moorestown, NJ police officer Robert Melia, Jr. has reached the highest echelon. In addition to recently being charged with three counts of aggravated sexual assault and one count of criminal sexual contact with three girls (along with his douchebag girlfriend), Melia has had even more charges filed against him. Want to know what for? Brace yourselves … here we go … four counts of animal cruelty after allegedly ENGAGING IN SEX ACTS WITH COWS between June and December 2006. WTF people. At what point does one start thinking, “you know, that heifer is really hot?!?!?!?!?”
Country singer Mindy McCready confirmed a long-term affair with pitcher Roger Clemens according to the NY Daily News. The News reported that the two met in a Florida karaoke bar when McCready was a 15-year-old aspiring singer and Clemens was a 28-year-old ace for the Red Sox and a married father of two. After the teenage McCready met Clemens at a Fort Myers bar called The Hired Hand, she returned with the Rocket to his hotel room, but there was no sex that night, sources told The News. It wasn’t until later, after McCready had moved to Nashville and become a country singing star, that the relationship apparently turned intimate. Um, riddle me this: what the hell is a 15-year old doing in a bar? Why would a 28-year old man (married or not) think it’s a good idea to bring said 15-year-old back to his hotel room? WTF is wrong with Roger Clemens? What a douchebag.
